WORDS – Language Barriers (Urban Vox)

After recognising that he doesn’t normally date in the orthodox manner, the blog’s newest male Experimental Dater – Urban Vox – fills us in on his most recent experiences from the online dating world.

Miss Twenty-Nine xxx

“Hello, so nice to talk to you” she answered as I messaged her on Lovoo, after getting the notification that she liked my profile

“Hi there! Glad you answered. 🙂 Just noticed you are just around the corner from me (0.2mile?) fancy having some coffee? I’m at Starbucks” I answered

“Yeah, ok! 5 minutes”  she messaged back to my surprise.

The first thing that crossed my mind was “wow! That was easy!”. Yeah… I should have known that nothing is as easy as it seems when it comes to my life!

Five minutes later and she hadn’t shown. It got to ten and still no sign of her…  After fifteen minutes I was about to message her to ask if she’d got lost, when she walked through the door, and I have to say that the photos had definitely not done her justice.

I could see her eyes from where I was seated, two green lagoons that I could definitely see myself drowning  in, without chance of salvation… Inviting red lips and a smooth almost fragile looking porcelain doll face.

“Wow” The noise kinda escaped my lips and I might have drooled a bit too. She saw me and walked towards my table and I made sure to get up to greet her as she got closer, mainly to make sure I had control over my limbs.  She greeted me back with two kisses on the cheeks.

I asked what she wanted to drink and she said “Latté , please” so I got up and got her one. I noticed the same strong Russian accent that a friend’s housemate L has …. A gorgeous woman who has shot down my advances on so many occasions!’

“£$%£$^££%$£%%£”£$” she said, or something that could have sounded like that as I didn’t get a word of what she told me then.

I think my reply was something like  0_o (A wordless emoticon that says it all!)  She noticed I didn’t get a word of what she said…

“You speak Russian?”  she asked.  I shook my head and replied ‘Nope‘ quite a bit more emphatically than I meant to!

She laughed a delicious laugh and asked “your name Russian, yes?” I explained to her that my grandpa was Russian and that’s where my name comes from. I kicked myself for not learning Russian like I wanted to do a few years ago. Just the week before I had been scolded by L for not caring enough about my roots to learn more about my family’s culture and history, not forgetting about language.

We did try to salvage the situation and had a good laugh trying, considering her English just got worse and worse and I didn’t know a word of Russian.

We spent about an hour laughing at each other’s attempts at communication until she looked at her watch gesticulated something I didn’t understand, got up, gave me another kiss on the cheeck and left giggling.

I went back to my friend’s flat still laughing to myself and hed a few more laughs later as I got there.  I told L all about it, and admitted to almost calling her to ask her to come and translate!

I wonder if I’m the only one that sort of thing happens to… lucky git huh? 😉

Another day another laugh!

Carpe Diem

Urban Vox